Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Thankful

As the Thanksgiving holiday approached, a lot of my friends have been using their social media accounts to proclaim that for which they are thankful.

I didn't do that.

Oh, on Sunday I told the world that I was thankful for the man who brought me coffee, the Sports section and breakfast in bed, then went downstairs to take care of his own damn mother.

And today I said I was thankful for my husband's ex-wife because she is cooking Thanksgiving dinner for us and all the kids tomorrow. All we have to do is bring the turkey, because the one thing my husband learned from his father was how to cook a fabulous turkey.

Frankly, there hasn't been a whole lot of stuff to be thankful for this past year or so, since I lost my job, my identity, my livelihood and much of my self esteem.  Since then I've been taking care of my mother-in-law on a daily basis, feeding her and dressing her and arguing with her as I drive her to dialysis three days a week, failing the math portion of the Praxis, trying to do freelance work for anyone who wants me to, waiting for those checks to come in, counting pennies to come up with the monthly car payment, living with broken heaters in my house and in my hot tub, reusing my daily-use contacts, dealing with kids who have gotten themselves in trouble and tried to deal with an estrangement from my own mother.

Basically, the last year has sucked balls. Big ones. And still does sometimes.

And while the rest of America is spending this week gathering around tables with their families and friends, I am not. My family doesn't do that. Not anymore.

But I can still find things for which to be thankful. Like ....

My husband, who loves me, who treats me like a queen, who cheers me on, who encourages me when I'm down, who picks me up when I fall, who always -- and I mean always -- takes my side, who believes me and believes in me, and who tells me, "Yes! I feel that new muscle in your leg." and "Yes! Your knees are getting prettier."

My daughter, the light of my life, who spends too much time in her room and needs to learn how to clean it, who cooks her own macaroni and cheese,  who is smart and funny and talented and sarcastic, who loves real books from Barnes and Noble, and alternative music, who draws kooky pictures, who can sing beautifully (but won't because it makes me cry), who writes beautifully, who gets up a half an hour early every morning so she can come upstairs and cuddle with me, who made my life the other day when she told me "You're the strongest person I know." Who knows I did what I had to do.

My stepchildren, who include me as part of their family, who claim me as their stepmother, who didn't need any therapy because of me, who make me proud to see them all grown up with wonderful careers and full, rich lives and who back me up when they need to. And my new step grandchild, who doesn't cry when she sees me anymore.

I'm thankful for my sisters. I'm thankful that I had a brother once. I'm thankful that I have a bunch of cousins that I've reconnected with on Facebook and some in real life. I'm thankful that I have a whole bunch of nieces and nephews and grand-nieces and nephews.

I'm thankful for my friends, who listen to me, who laugh with me, who cry with me, who give me advice, who know my stories, who drink with me, who take me to lunch. Who believe me,  and know I did what I had to do. Who believe in me and give me chances to do new things.

I'm thankful for my husband's ex wife, who agreed from the beginning that we were going to play nice, for being a friend and not an adversary, for sharing her children with me, for accepting mine into her her life, for all the wonderful keepsake gifts she has made me over the years, for going with me to see Donny Osmond, and for cooking Thanksgiving dinner so I didn't have to! And I'm thankful to her husband for being such a cool guy, too. And his kids.

I'm thankful for my dogs, who think I'm just the cat's meow.

I'm thankful for my walking shoes that allow me one hour every morning to dance down the street and clear my head and strengthen my body and give me prettier knees.

I'm thankful for the iPod portion of my iPhone, which holds more than 400 songs for me to dance to.

I'm thankful that, even though the newspaper took away my job, it could not take away my ability to write. And I'm thankful that other newspapers have given me the opportunity to use my talents to continue to tell stories.

I'm thankful for this blog, which allows me to write and tell stories and share our adoption journey with so many people. I'm thankful for each and every person who follows it, who subscribes to it, who has hit upon it accidentally while searching for "Mardi Gras and big tits" and "50" -- thinking it had something to do with "Fifty Shades of Grey."

I'm thankful for my pool. I know it's silly, but I dreamed of having a pool when I was a kid living in a trailer by the bayou in Houma. To me, it was the ultimate luxury. Now, I just love having it, looking at it, listening to it. It soothes my soul in ways I can't even describe.

I'm thankful for Pensacola Beach. And boiled crabs. And rib eye steaks. And chocolate covered cherries. And snowballs in the summer. And peppermint bark at Christmas. For Vodka. And Margarita daiquiris. And my two DVRs. And OnDemand. And my computer. And the Internet. And my cell phone. And SiriusXM radio. Any my piano. And MusicNotes because I can download sheet music anytime I want. And Amazon.com. And my Kindle reader. And my hair straightener. And Facebook and Twitter, because that's where I get my news nowadays. And football. And baseball. But not for soccer.Or mosquitoes. Or train crossings. Or hard freezes.

I have my health. I have all my senses. I have a family to call my own and people who love me.

And that's really all I need.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
My little turkey.








3 comments:

  1. Sounds like you WILL have a great day Lori. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family. (And I know you misspelled that word to see if anybody really reads this.)

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  2. I am very thankful for YOU. And that we bonded on a field trip and haven't looked back. Happy Thanksgiving, my friend. :)

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  3. I am very thankful for you, my friend Kristal.

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